She used to be a confidant, a drinking partner, a shoulder to cry on — one of my best friends.
Now, I look at her & roll my eyes because all I can see is her selfishness, evident in the way she blatantly bulldozed through boundaries I had clearly set, (& by the carefully constructed social media updates, designed to evoke sympathy or envy or understanding, despite being only a small fraction of the actual truth).
She justified her actions by trying to turn everything around as my fault for not being there for her while she was in the midst of the consequences of her poor decisions — despite my forewarning that those boundaries were a necessity to me & not just arbitrarily set.
Not a single sincere apology was uttered; it was expected that I would be the one to apologize, which was preposterous under the circumstances!
They say you shouldn't hold grudges because they do you more harm than anyone else (& I do miss her, terribly), but I refuse to put myself in the position to be walked all over again.
It doesn't matter who she is or how close we once were; if she can't respect me enough to honor boundaries I've clearly communicated, how can she continue to be an integral part of my life?