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I am, generally, a believe-in-the-best-of-people kind of person, if you get what I mean. I am almost naive that way at times & I know it. But, I have learned I am one of those people who can usually put myself in someone else's shoes. Imagine how they might feel in a particular instance… See their motivation behind their actions, good or bad. I have a good dose of empathy — yet those who lack empathy remain a mystery to me.
EMPATHY. “The ability to understand & share the feelings of another.”
It's one area that I, personally, reeeeeaaaaallly lack in: Being empathetic towards those who seem to COMPLETELY lack empathy. Or maybe they do have some amount of empathy but just don't care?
It doesn't compute.
I don't understand. It just doesn't compute for me & I really struggle with it.
Normally, I'd push it aside & chalk it up to people living their own lives as they will. I know God will sort us all out in the end. I do.
But, I struggle when I encounter these people — those who lack empathy — who are CLOSE to me, whom I care about, who seem to lack empathy to the degree that they trample on those around them.
I've been hurt too many times.
The people I love have been hurt too many times. Even more so, the people whom I feel it is my RESPONSIBILITY to protect & keep as healthy & happy as is within my capabilities have been hurt by these people near me who lack in empathy.
It's at that point when I feel I have to cut ties. If boundaries are being ignored over & over & over again… If actions are being taken as if these other people are the center of the world over & over & over again with NO regard for others… There comes a point when you just have to cut ties & be DONE.
But what if those who lack empathy are also family?
Do you still cut ties? If their behavior is becoming toxic to you & causing physical & emotional stress to your household — even if they are family — do you cut ties?
It seems so cut & dry…. Until it kind of isn't. I try reeeaaaallllly hard NOT to be a do-unto-others-as-they-have-done-to-me kind of person. I'd rather my actions reflect who I really am.
But, dang. This is a conundrum that seems to be an emerging pattern… It's upsetting.
But, I also know I am definitely in touch with my EMOTIONS if nothing else. 😉 What do YOU think?
Want to continue this conversation?
I'd love to! Email me at retajayne@confidenceandchaos.com or shoot me a private message.