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She used to be a confidant, a drinking partner, a shoulder to cry on — one of my best friends.
Now, I look at her & roll my eyes because all I can see is her selfishness, evident in the way she blatantly bulldozed through boundaries I had clearly set, (& by the carefully constructed social media updates, designed to evoke sympathy or envy or understanding, despite being only a small fraction of the actual truth).
She justified her actions by trying to turn everything around as my fault for not being there for her while she was in the midst of the consequences of her poor decisions — despite my forewarning that those boundaries were a necessity to me & not just arbitrarily set.
Not a single sincere apology was uttered; it was expected that I would be the one to apologize, which was preposterous under the circumstances!
They say you shouldn't hold grudges because they do you more harm than anyone else (& I do miss her, terribly), but I refuse to put myself in the position to be walked all over again.
It doesn't matter who she is or how close we once were; if she can't respect me enough to honor boundaries I've clearly communicated, how can she continue to be an integral part of my life?
This post was written in participation of this week's Six Sentence Stories link-up. The prompt was “close.” Read other submissions here.
She cant. I find that i can keep those people at an arms length but not in the inner circle.. They create too much of a psychic drain. Glad to see you at six sentences!!!
“Psychic drain.” Yes. That is EXACTLY it!! Plus, being so close to the third trimester of pregnancy, she’s just too stressful… She is someone who should have helped ease my stress levels at this period in my life — not the opposite… It just makes me so sad…
Life’s too short to put UP with “friends” who don’t act like friends.
Agreed. The matter is further complicated when it is factored in that she is also a blood relation…
It’s SO hard to stick to boundaries that you set but so important to once you’ve made up your mind to do it. And yes, when it’s family it is way harder.
This mere male probably doesn’t have the qualifications to join in the comments but clearly the line between being a friend and that of a user has been crossed; sadly the innocent one hurts the most by such behavior.
“Mere male?” Nah. None of that! You’re always welcome here. I think you’re correct.
You are wise to set boundaries for people that don’t encourage and support you. It took me many years to learn that! We can forgive, but that doesn’t mean we need to give them free access to run rampant in our lives again. Relationships often change, and those who once were close may have been just right for that time, but not for the present in our lives. Good use of 6SS!
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